How do you keep moving forward in difficult times?

I enjoy re-visiting posts from our Living Savvy archives.  When I re-visit, I
tend to connect to the information and stories shared in a new way, discovering something different depending on what is going on for me or people in my life.

When I am coaching someone, very often an issue will come up that will have me searching through the archives for a post best suited to help my client work through the process of Living Savvy, supporting them to ask, do, discover, commit & celebrate.

Today’s post was inspired by a friend of mine who kept moving forward in very difficult times.  She continues to inspire me even though she died in October of last year.  I was lucky to have Meryl in my life, a woman whose generosity, willingness and capacity to love at times seemed limitless.  A woman who was so full of life even when she was dying.  She is missed.

I mentioned in last week’s Champagne Friday that I had been spending time with my friend Meryl and her family, her husband and two young sons.

In the last 18 months Meryl has been diagnosed with metastatic cancer, had a lung removed, had tumours removed from her brain and her spine, and undergone many rounds of tests, treatments and strong medications.

Meryl and her family are living through some incredibly tough times. Each operation is risky, painful and scary, but to do nothing is also risky, painful and scary. Of course Meryl has bad days, filled with fear and sadness.

Yet I can see her spirit is still strong. She has hope for what each new day, each new moment will bring.

What is hope?

In January 2010, the Sydney Festival and ABC’s Radio National co-hosted an evening event called HOPE 2010: Crisis, Catharsis, Renewal.  They asked nine panellists: What do you hope for in 2010?

You can listen to the entire event here and below is a video of one of the presentations – this one from Yar Mayen, a 20 year old Sudanese refugee who came to Australia in 2006.

Another speaker, Peter Sellars, talked about the difference between hope and optimism, referring to the definition given by Cornel West, who in turn refers to Vaclav Havel.

You have to draw a distinction between hope and optimism. Vaclav Havel put it well when he said “optimism” is the belief that things are going to turn out as you would like, as opposed to “hope,” which is when you are thoroughly convinced something is moral and right and just and therefore you fight regardless of the consequences. In that sense, I’m full of hope but in no way optimistic. – Cornel West

Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. – Václav Havel

What gives you hope?

In the face of such adversity, I think what gives my friend Meryl hope is a strong life purpose – to ensure and savour the happiness of her family, her husband and two young sons.

I don’t believe our life purpose is some lofty, distant ideal. Our life purpose is for right now, it’s what pulls us through each day, it’s what gives us hope.

Whatever lies ahead, Meryl is clear and certain that working towards the happiness of her family will always be the right thing to do. This keeps her strong and hopeful moment by moment, day by day.

Image by eXage

Related posts:

1. Who moves you forward?
2. Inside Coaching: How do I take the very difficult first step towards change?
3. Living Savvy Episode #10: Karen shares her advice on tough times